Two days ago I made a remark about how nice a young woman’s new hair-do was. Hair is part of a woman’s physical appearance, and according to your school's own definition of sexual assault a remark about someone’s physical appearance constitutes sexual assault. Therefore, I committed sexual assault when I told this young woman that her new hair-do was very pretty. And I have no remorse whatsoever. In fact, I intend to make more remarks about women’s hair in the not so distant future. I am a psychopath. You better stop me before I compliment a woman on her hair again. After all, the only thing required for evil to succeed is for unimpeachably good people like you all to do nothing.
You are barking lunatics, by the way.