Friday, September 27, 2013

Thanks, Chris O'Leary!

I admit it. I ADMIT IT! My opposition to the legal recognition of ss'm' is based on nothing more than irrational hatred. I want to hate, hate, hate. There's nothing I love more than hating. I even hate that I love to hate. Don't think about that logical contradiction. I am irrational, remember? And now that I have admitted that I am nothing but a hater, who wants pure hate to consume all his mind and body right down to his last lymph node, I feel free, free, free. Oh, God, what joy! Even though I hate joy, and because this confessional mode is so thrilling, I have a couple more things to confess. 
Opposition to the legal recognition of ss'm' is just a fucking gay outlet for all this vehement hatred pent up in me. I mean, seriously, insisting that sexual difference matters, saying that it is normal to have a mother and a father, drooling at pin-ups of Maggie Gallagher, eating Barilla Pasta does not quite cut it when it comes to releasing the Kraken that is my avalanche of irresistible hatred. I need something a tad more Sturm und Drang, ya know?

And that's why I want to thank from the bottom of my hate-wallowing heart Chris O'Leary for comparing me to a racist and an anti-Semite. I did not want to admit it at the time, but what he did was to tell me my true calling. He made me confront my true self. He forced me finally out of my hate closet, in which I have been suffocating my truest yearnings for over four decades. Now, finally, I can be honest with myself.  So, I am now going to stop writing these piddling arguments against "marriage equality" (which no one reads anyway, except for bored Latvians) and embark on something more suited for my raging hate.  I am going to start building some gallows and gas chambers.  Because I want to lynch Niggers and gas Yids.  
Finally, my life has purpose and meaning, and I owe it all to Chris O'Leary.

For the all-too literal minded the following disclaimer may be useful: THE ABOVE IS REALLY THICK SARCASM.

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